Walking into work today, made brief eye contact with a guy, whose half-eaten sausage roll promptly slid out of its wrapper onto the pavement. I quickly averted my eyes since, as any man knows, the only thing worse than dropping your food on the floor is having someone see you do something stupid.
I was suddenly seized by the urge to buy him another sausage roll. Then I thought: it’s not that sad, it was only full of toxins anyway. He’s probably made a nett gain by failing to eat the whole of it.
Then I thought of the pig, who lived its whole life in crowded squalor, culminating in that sausage roll. Then I WAS sad.
7 comments so far...
Is it wrong that if I’d dropped it I’d have picked it up again? ;)
At least there’s not very much pig in a sausage roll.
Eating pigs is bad.
What if the pig had been very, very naughty?
good point. From now on all sausage rolls should come with a certificate saying whether the pig was nice or horrid. Then we know whether to be sad or to laugh and jump on the remains of the sausage roll
Before it was killed the pig may have been only three months away from developing a disease known as Jeff Winters disease (that was the pigs name) that would wipe out all pigs and humans. Therefore it was a good thing that the pig died but a bad thing that he dropped the roll. mmmm. Surely we can’t say whether somthing is right or wrong unless we know the full history and consequences born out over time. mmmm. food.
I used to become sad if I saw someone drop something or whatever. Then I decided I had two options on each occasion… 1) Pick it up, help out, buy them a new one OR 2) Don’t sweat it.
If you do 1, it will be very nice of you, and they will probably think you’re a loony (depending on the level of their droppage and your aid). If you do 2, it will be normal.
If you’d bought him another sausage roll, he would _definitely_ have thought you were a loony.
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